When Joe went to pick her up for their baseball game date, Amy was not ready. Joe waited and waited patiently. Finally, Amy was ready and they went to the baseball game.
They arrived during the 5th inning. "The score is 0 to 0," she heard a nearby fan say.
"Oh, good," she cooed to Joe, "then we haven't missed a thing."
The Farmer's Son tries out for football in college
The farmer's son was a huge, burly young man. As a college freshman he figured he'd try out for the football team.
"Can you tackle?" asked the coach. "Watch this," said the farmer's son, who proceeded to run smack into a telephone pole, shattering it to splinters.
"Wow," said the coach. "I'm impressed. Can you run?" "Of course I can run," said the farmer's son. He was off like a shot, and in just over nine seconds had run a hundred-yard dash.
"Great!" enthused the coach. "But can you pass a football?" The freshman rolled his eyes and hesitated for a few seconds. "Well, sir," he said, "if I can swallow it, I can probably pass it."
This is the Captain Speaking
About 90 fifth-graders, on their way home from a school trip, piled into the airplane. Once in the air the flight attendants began serving soft drinks and snacks.
You could hear them pleading with the children to settle down, respect the other passengers, and let them get some rest.
No amount of reasoning seemed to help.
The pilot picked up the PA mike in the cockpit and announced, "Children, this is the captain speaking. Don't make me stop this airplane and come back there!"
[Editor's comment: We want to thank Glen Carter of Raleigh, NC for sending the jokes. We have had many others to submit good jokes. One of the best of all times with jokes is Harrell Queen, also of North Carolina. I want to thank Dr. Lonnie Rex who persisted in persuading me to start a blog that would have jokes. To my utter amazement, Lighten up with Laughter is the favorite blog in Hugh's News. It is important to listen to people older and wiser than you and me.]